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Discover the profound impact of small acts of kindness on your self-esteem as we chat with Teru Nakashima, the innovative founder of a self-affirmation academy in Japan. His refreshing insights remind us that fluctuating self-esteem is natural and that embracing these shifts can be transformative. Nakashima introduces the intriguing concept of self-usefulness, showing how everyday actions—like wiping down a public restroom sink—can stabilize and boost our sense of self-worth. His approach is a refreshing departure from complex self-help advice, focusing on the accessible and the simple to foster a lasting positive impact.

Join us as we explore the psychological roots of self-usefulness and its ties to our evolutionary need for cooperation and group belonging. Nakashima's wisdom suggests that contributing to something beyond ourselves taps into an innate drive for survival and fulfillment. By focusing on outward actions, we're not only reinforcing positive behaviors but also building a reservoir of good feelings that enrich our lives. Tune in to uncover how small gestures, often overlooked, can lead to a deeper sense of self-worth and a more fulfilling life.

What are some signs that my self-esteem might be low? A decrease in self-esteem can manifest in several ways, but one common sign is a lack of motivation or a feeling of not wanting to work or engage in activities. It can feel like a general slump where you struggle to find enthusiasm. These feelings might suggest that your self-esteem has dipped and that it could benefit from some attention.
What is the relationship between self-esteem and self-worth, according to this source? The source highlights the concept of "self-worth" (or self-usefulness, translated more directly) as being critical to maintaining a more stable level of self-esteem. The idea is that by actively building your sense of self-worth through positive actions and self-recognition, you can reduce the volatility of your self-esteem. When self-worth is strong, you are less likely to be as dramatically affected by negative events.
How can I increase my sense of self-worth (self-usefulness)? The source emphasizes the importance of actively creating situations that enhance your self-worth. This doesn't require grand gestures; it can be as simple as performing small acts of service, such as wiping up water droplets after using a public sink. The crucial element is to consciously notice and appreciate these actions, giving yourself a mental "good job." This self-acknowledgment is key to boosting self-worth.
The source mentions “giving yourself a ‘like!’”. What does this mean? "Giving yourself a 'like!'" refers to the act of self-praise and recognition of your own actions. It is akin to acknowledging your good deeds, no matter how small, with a sense of personal approval, similar to receiving a positive reaction on social media. This inner "like" reinforces the value of your actions and contributes to your sense of self-worth.
Is it okay to feel self-satisfied when increasing self-worth? Absolutely. The source explicitly states that it's okay to indulge in self-satisfaction when you do something positive. In fact, embracing that self-satisfaction is an integral part of the process. You don't need external validation; the idea is to genuinely feel good about your own actions and to acknowledge the positive contribution you made. It's about giving yourself credit where it’s due, even if it’s just to yourself.

Teru Nakashima, All about Self-esteem

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